Thursday, August 24, 2006
1. The Movie Cop - Listen at the door. Step back, shoot out the lock and kick down the door.
2. The Movie Spy - Open the door to get a better look at the bad guys inside, never thinking that they might notice the light shining in the room from the doorway or the sound of the door opening.
3. The Sleep-walker - While sleep-walking, stumble into the door, bouncing off of it and stumbling back a few steps. Repeat until awakened by the bruise on your head.
4. The Clutz - Same as the Sleep-walker, but while awake.
5. The Geekwif - Open the door. Walk through. Forget to close the door completely and inadvertently let the cats out.
6. The Passive/Aggressive - Walk through the door and slam it shut. Wait to see if anyone reacts. When no one does, open the door and slam it shut again, only harder this time.
7. The Fonz - Enter the room, slick back your hair, strike a pose and wait for the applause.
8. The Star Trek - Walk through the doorway as it magically slides open on its own.
9. The Inigo Montoya - Body slam the door with your shoulder repeatedly and unsuccessfully.
10. The Fezzig - Shove Inigo aside, hit the door once with your hand, knocking it off its hinges, and step aside for Inigo to enter.
11. The Charlie's Angels - Kick the door down with your stilletto heels. Run into the room, shake your head to make your hair do that movie star swish while your two friends run in and stand next to you. Strike a pose with your gun pointed.
12. The Lara Croft - Notice the locked door at the end of a 100' hallway. Maneuever the ancient box onto the depression in the ancient stone floor. Notice the door opening at the end of the hallway. Make a mad dash toward the door, jumping over deadly spikes in the floor, dodging poison darts shooting out of the walls, and avoiding giant rolling boulders trying to crush you, all while shooting two pistols simultaneously and continuously to ward off the mercenaries, undead creatures, and wild animals that try to ambush you along the way. Dive and slide under the door just as it is about to slam shut again.
13. The Kramer - Stumble through the doorway, tripping over your own feet and nearly falling over. Then right yourself, and with a slightly dazed look on your face, act as though nothing is unusual at all.
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