Thursday, March 15, 2007
Yesterday morning at work...well, let's just say it wasn't such a good morning. I was in the middle of an on-going frustration and I sent a text message to a couple friends, unrestrainedly expressing my frustration.
My friend, Little B came to my rescue with the suggestion that we text each other ideas of things I could do to get fired and/or scare my bosses. It turned out to be a surprisingly successful exercise in stress relief, and at the end of the day there just happened to be 13 messages between the two of us. At 10 cents a piece, that's $1.30 – worth every penny.
1. I have a yellow smiley face stress ball on my desk. I could dig out its eyes, fill them with ketchup, and put it on my boss's desk attached to a list of my demands.
2. Beautiful. You could cut out letters ransom note style and put it on the copier and put them in everyone's box...including yours.
3. I could sneak into my boss's office and email his resignation to the entire company
4. PERFECT. Give a juicy reason too.
5. I could crank my ring tone (DC Talk - Jesus Freak) volume, have you call me several times throughout the day, and just let it ring until it goes to voicemail.
6. Sign on microwave "bomb inside" haha
7. Shoot spitballs in random directions over the cube walls.
8. Let the air out of everyone's tires.
9. Fart loudly.
10. ...and then giggle.
11. Then spray some bad air freshener over your cube.
12. Wear pajamas and slippers to work.
13. ...and no bra.
Disclaimer: Of course, if my boss is reading this, I would never do any of these things in reality. In fact, I don't know where this came from. Who wrote this? Did someone sabotage my blog? I don't know what you're talking about...ahem...sir.
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